Saturday, December 15, 2012

Attendance down, no gift exchange...and a threesome?

We have all heard the phrase "absence makes the heart grow fonder". Although there has not been an overwhelming clamor for a resumption of the blog, one little comment by Beth was enough to inspire an early morning re-cap of the annual Christmas Hearts game at the Dichter's. Proving once again that varying from the 3rd Saturday of month never pays off, the crowd was down to a dismal 10. Long entrenched regulars chose to play poker with old buddies (Steve), play Bunco with "real" friends (Toni), sing songs to old lonely people (Lisa) or assume that the game was on the third Saturday of the month (imagine that!) (John). The awkward configuration resulted in one table of four and two tables of three.

While three people at a table is not ideal or preferred, there was no need for any special accommodations since Toni was with her true friends. As you recall Toni has a lifetime exemption from playing at a table of three. Refer to this excerpt from the March 2009 entry: "One other interesting tidbit from the evening: the refusal of Toni to play at a table with anything other than 4 people. Everyone thought Dan was the psycho about playing with 4....turns out that we were so taken aback by the balls it took to even suggest this that we all accepted her terms and apparently she has a lifetime exemption."
As the prelim games progressed, a strategic play by one of her opponents prompted Cindy to quietly state "If I was Debbie I would call you a turd". Andy and Dan simultaneously chuckled at the memory and shuddered at the thought of being the target of Debbie's rage. How can anyone forget that night? Let's take another nostalgic journey through a previous blog: "Debbie, possibly feeling liberated as the hostess of the evening, silenced the room when she declared: "you are a TURD!!" Stunned, we all glanced down at our cards awkwardly praying it was not us that had spurred her to such an outburst." Author's note: Shortly after Cindy's comment, what was heard coming out of the other room? You guessed it! "You are a Turd!!!"

Thankfully we are Toni's second level friends because I can not for a moment think how she would have reacted to the decision to play a three handed championship game but that was the decision. Beth deftly dodged points and dominated the outmatched Andy and Mark to take the trophy. While no one disputed that the trophy was rightfully hers, there was some shock and disbelief at her unwillingness to "man up" and prove her true hearts superiority by putting the trophy back up for grabs in the subsequent 4 handed game that Dan joined. Sensing that the non stop, testosterone tainted comments regarding the trophy may somehow come to be, Beth excused herself from the table, grabbed the trophy and hid it in her car. As she returned with a sly smile on her face you had a feeling she was thinking "If you think I am going to be sucked into your macho "mine is bigger than yours" male mind games you got another thing coming...LOSERS!" Congratulations Beth, the trophy is yours.